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moonchild
 lover.friend.daughter.sister.jewelry designer. student of life.creative.writer.cancer. native new yorker.residing in new jersey. Instagram
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So where do I start..lol. Well, Friday I worked from 3-7. How boring. Um..I went out with friends afterwards...to Cranford to the best cafe ever.. Rockn Joes. Can't say much more about that night..Saturday I woke up at 1..cleaned til about 5 lol then showered, curled my hair for the first time since the spring..lol and decided to go out to eat in the city with my parents and their friends. We ate at the Palm across the street fro the Gershwin Theater..yknow..where they used to have Cats at. It was reaally nice..lmao..the bill was $650 but since my dads friend knew the owner we got half off. The best steak I ever ate and the BEST Raspberry sorbet EVER. Sunday..I woke up at 1:30 and about and hour later Mercwedes called me to go out with her to Clifton, Wllowbrook..etc. So i went. Did what we had to do went to Rockn Joes again..and then came out at 7:30. Oh I watched Flashdance for the first time that night. What an awesome movie..sometimes I wish I danced when I was little..I was in dance class for like a week but I was too shy and wouldnt let go of my mothers leg so she took me out and eventually put me in gymnastics. But yeah the dancing in that movie is off the chain..of course out-dated a bit being the movie came out in the 80's but still hott nonetheless. SHE'S A MANIAC, MANIAC....on the floooor! Just great. This week is finals..I just fnished my last one today. I got home at 10 since I only had to take a math final. Yesterday i took my pysch final and art final..what a joke those were. Pysch was like, the easiest test I ever took in that class. I was real mad that it was that simple. And art..if you paid attention and wrote down her notes from friday, you aced it. Because all it was, was fill in the blank and 5 short answer questions. Then yowe had to draw a portrait of ourselves on the last page. It was kinda easy..the only difficulty was the fact i has my hair lookin like Farah Fosset so I had to be a bit tedious on my hair but since i drew my face before for the charcoal drawing it was easy. Now I have off on Wednesday bc its make up day and wel..no one goes to school if they didnt mis a final so yeah DAY OFF FOR ME! Thursday we go to all of our new classes...I have English first block, Web Design, and Gym..altogether now...EASY! & I get out earlier because i have C lunch and dont necessarily have to go to C lunch..so I can leave at 1230. OH DID I MENTION???!?! I GOT ACCEPTED TO RIDER UNIVERSITY TODAY! Not my first choice of schools, but nonetheless great that I did get accepted being I was real worried about my grades and what not..& I'm glad they gave me a chance. Bless their hearts. I'm real excited. I'm not making any decisions yet I have four more schools to go so yeah we'll see. Right now I have to go eat dinner..so I'll ttyl. <3 shannon quote of the day: the one is love. -janet Things get to me...so i'm currently trying to just let things flow by their own damn selves. I honestly haven't the energy to be so vulnerable anymore. You know when you'd just do anything and everything for something, and it just doesn't happen..and you want to give up, and you just can't? Well that's me. And I've come to the liberating conclusion that..Vulnerablity is a ho. It goes around and around..but most of the time gets you nothing but more personal problems. So..I tried to get what I wanted..i tried..more like put myself out there open to the free world. I really don't have much to prove, I am who I am so I realize being so open isn't the right mode of acceleration for the situation. I'm just going to have to be recognized for what and who I am; and how I may..possibly be someone worth something. Until that is all realized and put into perspective..I have needs. Which will be taken care of. Speaking of which..I should be on the phone right now. So i'll catch you girl scouts later. shannon<3 QUOTE OF THE DAY: I'd rather grow old and alone then to ever have another lover. -janet how can something so good feel so right and still feel wrong? what do u see in her that aint in me what does she do that i cant see and is this all makebelieve? fansty and imagination selfishness and idealation could it be that we arent what we're meant to be and am i just too blind to see that you and me will never be or is it you whos scared to tell a secret that you hide so well do you want the same as i and want to give it all a try or am i just dreaming again that you'd take my heart to mend ill close my eyes and see your face lick my lips your spirit ill taste and continue this dream so atleast my imagination wont go to waste. QUOTE OF THE DAY: time enjoyed wasting, is not wasted at all. -john lennon So that is totally erased and repressed from my mind. It's not my loss. :) Now I have to go continue to chase my nephew around the house! <3 QUOTE OF THE DAY: "I'm out like a fat kid in a dodgeball game!" - Anthony 2nd block Art. lmao.
i'm officially distant from the "at home" situation. i dont wanna know or hear about it anymore. and well i think i did more school work in this week than i've done in the past 3 and a half years of high school. I had a Mental retardation,Giftedness, and Autism report to do..got a 98. I had artwork to semi-complete (it's a life sized portrait of myself on a stool) and then I had ONE day to do a poster on CHILD DEVELOPMENT using my own pictures, and a research paper on Gender Roles. Now I am finishing up a report on Child Observation and blah blah. So stupid. My pyschology teacher is like..crazy. The end of the semester is next week, and she must think she HAS to give us all this work for some odd reason..and in all honesty, I love waiting til last minute. I work well under pressure..hence the 98 I got on that essay I did 5 hours before school. LOL. and this weekend..hasn't been anything exciting Friday I was wayy to beat and tired to go do anything spectacular. So ian just came over..around..hell i dont even know all i know is he left at 4:30. Yesterday? I worked from 12-7..supposed to be til 9 but its sooooo dead and Tie jus said i could leave if i wanted. So I went home ate..was supposed to go get coffe w/ mercedes..but she decided to be beat and not leave her house.. so i went home watched Issac (my new favorite obsession that ill get into later) and then i went out around1 with ian since he was at his aunts house w. family and we went to eat at menlo park diner. and today. today i was soooo tired. didnt help i got home at 5 and had to be at work at 11...so i woke up at 9:30 and omg..work was just so pointless. no one was there...we didnt sell til 12:30 and i ended up leaving at 3. now im sittin home. everyone is going to abyss and this kid steve asked me to go and ugh...i really dislike abyss. been there twice and there are just too many dirtbags there..three quarters of the people cannot dance. and its teen night. wtf. what is so fun about a teen night? all it usually is is a bunch of 13 year olds who swear they are 18 and try to buy drinks all night when HELLO..they aint selling any. that is just too beat for me. i mean might as well go to one51 or the coliseum. i know one bouncer at the coliseum and two at one51..so why even ask me to go to a teen night. ???? ANYWAYS, on to my new obsession. "Issac" on the STYLE network. If he isn't the best thing since sliced bread..then omg i dunno what is. He is HILARIOUS! Ugh I love him to death. He has some of the best guests on, and he's just so random. Like, you know how most hosts have to be professional, they read off cue cards and are directed where to stand and sit and blah blah blah. Well, not Issac..he runs all over his set, he does what he pleases, and hes so..its just funny how real and down to earth he is. Like, he knows hes doing a show, but it makes you feel real comfortable seeing how random and kind of unorganized he is. Oh , it's great. That show really enlightens me. Which is probably why the link to his part of the STYLE Newtork site is www.haveabetterday.com ! lol. You guys should definately watch him..on STYLE at 7PM and 11PM everyday. I'm about to go..my phone is telling me to "Check on it tonight"...lol ttyl. QUOTE OF THE DAY: "Delicious coffee anyone?" -Issac! everything is just wrong. my family, school,...everything. y'know i'm really glad i have work and the few people i hang out with. honestly, if it wasn't for those two things i'd be insane by now. i've already written about whats going on in my house with my brother..and it's only gotten worse. and ...ugh..i've witnessed it before, but right now it hurt even more to watch. i just wanna lock myself in my room sometimes and just..cry and cry and cry. its killing me. and with all of this going on i start thinking about other things..and they make me upset. sometimes i dont even know why im crying. its really too much. i really did not picture this year starting like this. its so unfortunate, it really is. it's not like i'm not trying to be optmistic either. i am. i'm trying to encourage myself every single day to pick myself up and go on because I can only be rewarded by taking care of myself and doing the right things. staying out of everyone elses business and focusing on me. which brings up another thing..i get these feelings of guilt that maybe i focus on myself too much. when i know i shouldnt be thinking that way;i should always come first to me. but its like, maybe i'm shutting people out because of this... see..i hate when i get upset about things..they make me think about other things a lot harder than i should and i get these thoughts out of left field, that are just so bizarre. i just can't help it. my friend Ian came over last night..and he talked to me about all of this, but first and foremost he let me vent. which kinda eased a lot things. but it was nice having someone who doesnt give me a big loud "sigh" when i bring something up that follows with a rant. i dont have many ppl who i can just straight out vent to. which is also another thing that i thought about and is very discouraging..but then just knowing he allowed me to do that encouraged me to just keep my head up. But..God..it all hurts so, so bad. and i hate to admit it but I'm scared..the whole situation scares me to death. i know i can only chose t grow from this, or to wallow in dispair. i want to grow from it, and i want to learn and make it positive. it is just so hard and confusing. you guys reading this probably think im out of my damn mind or something; not that i care..everyone needs to rant. and i know we all get confused and upset.. i just wish i knew a way this time to get through it.. shannon<3 QUOTE OF THE DAY: "I'm living, so I'm grateful.." |