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moonchild
 lover.friend.daughter.sister.jewelry designer. student of life.creative.writer.cancer. native new yorker.residing in new jersey. Instagram
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I tried to reach you, I could almost feel you, You were nearly here and then you disappeared. Never date a guy who is totally unsure of himself and needs reassurance daily. Girl bye. I am not here for your parade. It's fine to tell him once but to tell twice and thrice and he still cries like a child? No. Babysitters are -----------------------------------> that way. I can tell you straight up, that will never happen again. How did this random ass post come about you ask? Well, today someone asked me about a situation a friend is going through. This guy she was with is so out of control with his emotions. It's sickening. Through the whole relationship he acted as if he wasn't "worthy" and constantly made her feel like she should leave him because he would never live up to someone he thought she should be with. I know that all too well. And to me it's like, well open up your damn eyes and take the blanket off your FACE. She picked you! Now be grateful before she actually decides you're a bitch and leaves your ass for sitting in the hole you're digging. Luckily for her, he got the clue and is working on himself and appreciating what he has. Things are still rocky but not as much. But I honestly, thought I was the only one who dealt with a guy with the self-esteem of an 11 year old girl. Such a tragedy. However, what a learning experience. Built me a radar system. Reassurance is okay, in needed situations and at certain times in a relationship -- it's natural. Everyone needs reassurance every now and then. But everyday?! Please. This isn't Nick Jr. I am not coming to your rescue because you have issues beyond me. Hell, I have my own issues to deal with. It sounds cold-hearted but if you really know what I'm talking about -- you too, will understand. Picture this..You're dating a guy, finally -- after months and months of talking. He's been interested in you for a really long time and you know you're all he wants and thinks about. Plus. However, in every intimate conversation about love, etc. he brings how he isn't sure he can make you happy, that he doesn't know if he's good enough, compares himself to others that he thinks are more worthy than he. How would you feel? Well, I started to feel like I was doing something wrong. As if it were me that wasn't letting him know how much I cared, etc. But you know what? The fact that I was with him, wanting to hang out whenever I could, talked to him first thing in the morning and the last thing before I went to sleep -- all of that should've been enough to eliminate the insecurity. But it wasn't. I quit. & I don't recommend anyone in trying to fix anyone who thinks this way even after you explain to them more than three times. It's a lost cause after that. They've already put you on that unreachable pedastal in their mind. You can't be touched and you are an etherial figure in their eyes. Honestly, nobody should be godly in anyone's eyes. That's too dangerous of a position to put anyone in. Why? Cause you're either going to let someone else down or let yourself down. Plain and simple. It's a hole. You have to let them go. In my case, I did. So glad I did. I've come to find a lot of guys my age act this way (I'm 20 now, I was 18-19 at the time) and now I've come to find my interests in older guys. No, not old, old but about 3 - 5 years older than I am. The 24-26 year old mark is a point in everyones life where they become a little more sure of themselves. By then, people should be working, out of college, or in graduate school. I know I'm nowhere near graduating with a Bachelor's yet but I set a plan, have two jobs, finally financially stable, purchased my own car, go to school full time and I know what I want. I believe I have much to offer anyone I choose to get involved with. However, guys my age all seem to be in the same position the last was in. Just floating. School, no job, and focused on shit a frat boy would be focused on. In other words, nothing in common with me. Call me ahead of my time, grown for my age, whatever, but honestly, in this world and in today's day and age -- you shouldn't have to sit around for anyone or worry about anyone but yourself. You want someone to compliment you and what you do -- to be strong in themselves and what they do; to be strong as an individual and have the ability to share. I don't think anyone in my age bracket should waste their time on anyone who doesn't look at any kind of relationship as a mutual, serious friendship in which you both have the chance to learn and grow together, from one another. Push those floaters to the back of the class. |