Now my nose is semi-clogged and I get that tingling in my nose to sneeze
almost every 5 - 10 minutes - which is preventing me from sleeping.
Death to ALLERGIES! They ruin lives.

Anywho, I decided to kill sometime and write an entry I've been dying to
write for awhile. However for the sake of this person and our
progrssing sitation I didn't. But at this point in time, I don't care.
I want to be straight foward and get it all out of me.

Before I go on, my last post about something happening, I'm not going to
write about lol. Sorry guys but I gotta keep something personal lol.
Anywho moving right along.

Without mentioning names, its the least I can do at this point lol, I am
severely interested in this guy. I have no idea what it is - he is just
completely addicting to me. For awhile, I tried not to pay any
attention to it all - I avoided the idea of being remotely interested
for many reasons. One being that family members of mine, once they met
him, thought he & I should be married.

Mood killer? YES. I mean damn. LMAO. I mean I always thought he was
attractive but I always do things differently than others. I take my
time and talk a great deal....try to figure out as much as possible. And
to be told, "oh, you guys have to end up together...you can get
married!" what in the hell..lmao now why would I even consider anything
now that you've planned out our lives??? LOL so that was a setback.

Then there's the element that he's really good friends with my "people"
(I say people because if I blantantly came out and said who he's close
with..well it would be too obvious LOL) and talks to my "maker"(another
alias lmao) on the regular, etc. I don't know..that issue would be
moreso for him but I could give a damn what the hell my "people" would
have to say. I'm about to be 21 and have never been stupid in relations
before so..I don't really think they should have any say. My "maker"? I
don't think he could give a damn. I mean, he likes him enough already
to keep in touch and hang out so..its not like he has no idea who he
is. I think the prior relations would be a better deal than me bringing
someone who they have no clue about...am I right?

Another thing would probably be my "people's" knowledge of
his....hm..flirting lol I mean I'm not dumb..he's a guy and prior to
this revelation of mine, I knew he was just like any other single guy
trying to enjoy life. Whatever. Shit like that doesn't bother me as long
as people live their lives responsibly and have great intentions.

I honeslty feel he's a great guy however, I have no idea where he's at
in his life and if he would even consider a relationship. Not that I'd
rush anything...I'm not into all that instant crap with people I
genuinely feel for. I wish I knew. We keep in touch a lot - not as
much as I'd like but we do which I will admit, I enjoy.

And recently, he gave me the impression that he MAY feel the same way.
I mean, I found out in a completely unconventional way but I'm all for
suprises. LOL. When I read it, my heart dropped and I couldn't help but
smile. I just hope he meant it the way I think he did.

I'm not one to think ahead on things like this, but I do believe this
could be one for the books..

So if you're reading this and you know this is you...now you know.
Hopefully, you'll be kind enough to either stop me in my tracks or
reassure my current thoughts..
:)

Thanks..

What do you guys think I should do?